Get Your Fanny Down Under to Sydney, Australia

I did the Sydney Harbour Bridge Climb http://www.bridgeclimb.com/?gclid=COuwuoiYucMCFcECaQodr7gAhg  the first time I went to Australia.  It was on my bucket list.  I was supposed to do it with a friend who lives there but he had a change of heart.  I met a fellow traveler from Perth so I invited her to go with me. 

Once there you have to sign your life away and take a breathalyzer.  Then they give you a suit to change into.  The guide said, “Just leave your socks and underwear on.” This will be important later. 

So we are almost all complete strangers and we are killing ourselves laughing because we know we only have socks and underwear on under this shiny lightweight suit. 

Then we get on gloves, hats, audio sets, belts with packs that have fleece sweaters in them to wear later if we get cold.  Everything we were wearing clipped onto our suits.  All ready and head out.  Get clipped onto line—very safe very easy anyone can do it—and off we go. 

Obviously not so easy I forgot how to climb ladders without banging my legs and I know I’m black and blue.  We cross over the highway below and this is getting to be cool. 

It’s easy walking but September is spring in Australia and its a little cold getting to the top in just my underwear and shiny suit.  We’re all getting cold to which the guide states he didn’t tell us we had to take all of our clothes off.  Seriously he is the only asshole I’ve met in Australia. 

We do photos at the top with the Opera House in the background and a group photo.  We are on the Sunset Climb so we watch a small plane fly within reach over our heads and into the sunset.  Its jaw dropping amazing up here and so quiet. 

I’m cold.  I have to pee.  I said to my new friend, “Open my fanny and get my fleece out.  Ah come on. It’s big just reach in with both hands and grab it.”  She’s laughing hysterically.  Tears are running down her face.  I said, “Grab my fanny!”  “Stop, stop,” she said.  She gives me my cozy fleece.  I’m good with life now.  She stops crying with laughter and she tells me that fanny in Australia is a vagina and proceeds with a long list of other vagina slang words just in case I didn’t know them.  Word to the wise, a fanny in South Africa is also a vagina.  Point taken. 

Laughing, we head back down the bridge.  Our time watching the sun set was sweet and short lived.  Holy f*** it’s so dark getting down.  Think really think.  If you go up in daylight to watch the sun set what did you think would happen. 

In total it was over four hours to do it and it has to be booked ahead of time.  You need to arrive early to do the safety briefing and breathalyzer, suit up, wait after for your photos to print and of course browse in the gift shop.  I wouldn’t recommend just showing up.  I would highly recommend that you do this.  Just maybe do the Day Climb.

Places You Have to See

Sydney Opera House http://www.sydneyoperahouse.com/homepage.aspx?gclid=CK7vipqWucMCFQ4waQodiL0Amg

Sydney Harbour Bridge http://www.australia.gov.au/about-australia/australian-story/sydney-harbour-bridge

Sydney Aquarium http://www.sydneyaquarium.com.au/

Sydney Tower http://www.sydneytowereye.com.au/

Darling Harbour http://www.darlingharbour.com/

The Rocks http://www.sydney.com/destinations/sydney/sydney-city/the-rocks?gclid=CLjfhb-WucMCFYY_aQodXxQA0g

Sydney Wildlife Park http://www.wildlifesydney.com.au/?gclid=CNnm182WucMCFQovaQodDTMABA

Australia Museum http://australianmuseum.net.au/

Boat cruise of harbor on a Captain Cook cruise http://www.captaincook.com.au/

Day trip to the Blue Mountains http://www.viator.com/Sydney-attractions/Blue-Mountains-tours-tickets/d357-a290?pref=02&aid=g2059&gclid=CLjmjpiXucMCFZI0aQodgEoAcg

Ferry ride to Manly Island to see fairy (Little) penguins at night http://www.manlyaustralia.com.au/

If you have a few days

Great Ocean Road, Victoria Australia http://www.visitmelbourne.com/Regions/Great-Ocean-Road.aspx.  One of the most breath taking drives in the world.  It takes you along the Australian coast to the 12 Apostles.  Leave Melbourne and drive to Warrnambool. Stop at the 12 Apostles Visitor Centre in Port Campbell National Park.  There are magnificent rock limestone formations.  They used to be called Sow and Piglets but 12 Apostles sounds and sells much better.  They never was 12.  There was more but due to erosion they will eventually disappear.  They are best viewed from above by a 15 minute helicopter ride.  http://www.12apostleshelicopters.com.au/  Farther up the coast is London Bridge which like the children’s song fell down.  It actually fell down leaving a man and woman stranded there until rescued fuelling gossip when they left before being interviewed by the press.  Rendez vous gone wrong?  Melbourne is only a 45 minute flight from Sydney.

Things You Need to Know

A Visa is required by Canadian travelers.

It is a long flight and jet lag will happen but it’s worth it.

Australian dollar similar in value to Canadian but there change is $2, $1, $.50, $.20, $.10, and $.05.  Like Canada pennies are no longer is circulation.

English speaking.

Very friendly and helpful.  An Australian slang dictionary is a good thing to carry.

Drive on the left.

Australian made products have a green and yellow tag.

Do not buy Fosters beer in Australia.  It’s mainly exported and for tourists.  Try something local on draft.

Wide variety of accommodations such as Sheraton, Hilton, Ibis, Australian chains, B&Bs, cruises and hostels.  I have stayed at international and Australian hotels and I found a gem in Sydney The Grace Hotel.  I highly recommend it.

Tipping or gratuities are not required or expected.

Multi-cultural and a wide variety of dining options in cities.  In smaller towns it is more difficult to find healthy options.

Trains, ferries, taxis and walking are all options.  In Sydney you can even buy a hop on hop off pass for the ferry.

Buy an attraction pass on line before you leave.  It usually is good for a few attractions but is time specific.  It is cheaper and saves you time in line.